And on days when there is true harmony, the writing goes to the book(s). Blogs must wait until another day.
Did I mention I was banned from the site with my "pals" that argue back and forth? Bitties! I could call them worse, but in the end, we're still on 2 or 3 other boards together and well, it's beneath me to get sooo nasty without being sanctimonious. I'm still focused on the other boards, the political ones and the African American board. I say that because they have actually had a topic about whether or not White people should be excluded from the site. Enter my sensibilities--wouldn't that mean that in some cases, one half or 1/4 or 1/8 of their own persons could not post? Yes, an affirmative. I just like the idea of countering prejudice with sense. Until it's gone, I'll continue just the way I have been. It's meaty and it loosens up my hands for the day, crippled and wilted from that damn disease. And I actually have to make a living with these things...unreal. Some day I'll ensure them for $500,000. Not a million because that's already overkill and passe for the Hollywonders that do that for their legs and other body parts. I'll just do it to do it...besides is it even possible that another part can break on these bones? I think I've covered all the bases as is.
That board is something else. I just stopped back there and yet again, another dagger comes out for the old girl. I just can't stand those convos that deviate from the topic and call me an Oppressor Lover. I mean, sure, I could be called worse, but by my own team? Hardly sounds fair though it is amusing. One the one hand, I'm the Angry Black Woman on White Message boards...they just can't handle the truth, I guess...but there is very little anger. It's mostly projection that they are misunderstanding. On the Black board, I'm the lover of the Oppressors, so Eurocentric I can't see straight. That's the belief. Never should have told them about that ring...now they can't forget it. Maybe I like walking that fence. Who knows? Maybe I'm amused that I confuse people that much. But maybe, just maybe I play the Devil's Advocate because I know it forces people to think on their feet and challenge their current belief system. They don't have to believe mine...not under any circumstance...but they can't very well stay stuck on stupid either. Not in my presence. It's holier than thou, sure...but hey, I wear it well.
At any rate, I'm getting tired of it all. These days I actually play a lot more than debate. I find time for debate sure, but I limit it considerably. It really isn't good for my health. So this week, I've stuck to simple issues and simple topics like the war in Iraq and this whacko trying to save his butt by lying and claiming he killed Jonbenet.
Ok..wasn't going to blog this, but what a sick bastard! He plays the pedophile role well, but when it comes to frying his ass in Asia, he opts for claiming he murdered and sexually assaulted a child that he did a term paper on to get into US prisons because what, they are a cake walk for sick puppies like him? I rad his resume the other day and HELLO red flag city on the pedo tip. I mean, this monster should have been in some prison a long time ago. His first wife was 13! That went out with Jerry Lee Lewis. And now, Nancy Grace has an entire week dedicated to him. Confessions of a killer with a damn question mark. When Nancy Grace isn't even calling him out, that's a sure sign there is a weak case somewhere. I'm as liberal as the day is long but pedophiles have no place in our society. I strongly advocate imprisoning them for the duration of their natural lives...and then 50 more years for their unnatural lives. Killing them? No...who's pain does that end?
I just think it's interesting...these pedos and serial killers. One group leaks them out the most. People think of the word pedophile and they see a 45 year old White man, don't they? They think serial killer and the same person comes to mind. When are people going to get that there is something seriously wrong with that picture? These scum are being bred by a nation that supports them. A nation that is fathering them and nurturing them. Yet...who are the ones that are villified? The Brown ones. Hardly seems right.
In TV land, I caught Spike Lee's Requiem on Katrina. It was done in 4 parts and I HATE that my Tivo didn't record the first 2. Apparently I had it set up to record anything he was noted as directing. I did this a month ago because the listing wasn't showing yet and I knew I would forget about it--lovely meds--and the purpose was to avoid all this and damnit if I didn't do it anyway.
I saw part 3 and spent the greater part of that hour in tears. I can't take sorrow in Louisiana. It's my birthplace and that's the blood running through these veins. I just couldn't take it...watching all those people, my fellow citizens, my sistas and brothers wading through water, criminalized and called refugees in their OWN HOMES and left to die. I never use the word hate in terms of people. It's far too simplistic and it's overused and doesn't convey the right emotion...but I can think of no other way to describe a President that would leave all those people to die.As we approach the one year mark--with very little having been accomplished in the Gulf, I know that I will never get the sound out of my head of a woman mourning the death of her 5 year old daughter who was washed away in the waters and not found for 6 months. I have a 5 year old. Washed away? A baby? And not found for 6 months. It was a scream and wail that came from her womb and made its way to the surface. It's one that every mother will hear and fall to her knees to pray to God she never ever feels what that woman is feeling. Ever. And a government that would allow it...allow those levees to be left as they were and left those people as they were BEFORE the damn hurricane...may God have mercy on their souls, because I sure as hell cannot.
So much for not blogging. I think I need to talk about Katrina more. I left Louisiana on a Sunday after burying my grandmother. Katrina came the next day. They say most everyone has PTSD from the hurricane. I had it before then, but after 9/11 and after Katrina, we are a nation of Post Traumatic Stress in varying forms of disorder. That's blogging tomorrow. Maybe I should stop over at my happy blog tonight and flip this up a bit. Must have the balance. Think I will.
Remember Katrina people. Remember that people aren't home yet. New Orleans cannot ever be the same without it's heart in place. It's heart is spread out across the US now. It must be repaired. It just must be.
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Sunday, August 20, 2006
Clearly, it's been a week.
It all started out fine, I guess...in the message board realm. No real wars. Well, until I stumbled back to a familiar stomping ground that is. Why I returned is something only a really bad therapist would answer.
I poked around the political threads, saw that a guy pal of mine joined in on a few pertinent topics while I was "away" and I added my own spin on the spin. This is the purpose of aforementioned message boards; to put your spin on some previous spin. That's what we do.
Some go to fight. Some go to talk. Some go to "make friends"...and for those sorry lots, bars are cheaper and the friends longer lasting. Mind you, read that sentence again. You don't go to a board to make a friend. It's the silliest thing to do in the world. What you will find is people you agree with, people you don't and those that agree with you ( altogether different than you agreeing with them--yes, you had to be there) and even those that will not, could not, in a house, with a mouse no matter what.
So when I see the topic of "What is assimilation", an alarm goes off in my head. You see, I've known this particular group for 3 years. We've been up and down every side of every story every which way but loose...and we still end up on boards together. There is something sick about that because most of us don't particularly like each other. Second alarm. Now...with the alarms already going off, I should run. I should head for a place where I know I won't have these conversations, and where I know I won't feel compelled to state exactly how I feel, where I can pre-type the replies to each of my posts hours before it pops into the heads of "some" because it's a subject I've covered again...again and again.
I'll pull out the Anti-Racist links. I'll pull out the Tim Wise articles because I know that people, well, some people respond better to hearing the exact same thing that comes out of my mouth when it comes from a White person's mouth. This is because the filters they use to listen to me are not alerted or turned on when they hear that other speaker. With me, they see my avatar a mile away. They know what I'm going to say and I know what they are going to say...so we dance.
Now, we all know my biggest peeve is lumping and labeling. It's not ok to say ALL White people or ALL Black people or ALL Hispanic people or Asian people especially since with the latter you are talking about MANY millions of people from DIFFERENT countries that speak different languages from even each other..yet we toss them into those comfy little boxes so our brains can digest them more easily. Making someone more palettable. No, I don't know how to spell that and spell check irritates me, so it won't happen.
So..I chime in. I urge myself and plead with myself to be patient. I beg and reason with myself to not give it straight no chaser but to say it softly...but that's just not me. I am straight no chaser. Hard up, against the wall, with a pillow. No, not dirty talk..get a bartender's guide and your mind out of the gutter. But, I digress.
My two cents was this: Assimilation is not insisted upon, it's forced. It's not assimilate to "MY" culture ( not meaning me MY )because I explain that culture has not yet been created. We're only so many years old. It's just not there. Even Apple pie and baseball cannot be claimed by us. Culture is expected but impossible is where I go. I persist. I say it's forced upon all of us. People will look at their neighbors that practice voodoo and scream change, CHANGE! or you cannot stay here...you most certainly cannot be American. These same neighborly neighbors will not stop at a library to read about voodoo....they will not learn that it's Christianity in another guise. They will call out aninal sacrifice as cruel and inhumane. Well, that's why they are animals, not humans. Sorry Peta friends. We eat chicken in drive thrus. We consume more beef than ANY place on the planet. We eat our animal sacrifices too. Just because we don't watch the slaughter video does not mean we are holier than thou. It means we are dumb. It means we are hypocrites.
I move on from my perspective..and no, I didn't lay it out like that above at all. I was a bit soft and it was solely an African American slant. Then...I took notice of the "new" forum. 25 new topics in a new forum called "Illegal Immigration"...are you kidding me? And they want to talk Assimilation with ME? LMAO!
The main arguments in the I.I. forum have been the same we hear on O'Reilly...I'm not allowed to watch anymore because he does horrible things to my blood pressure. A good Liberal would sue him. A good Republican ( oxymoron ) would simply urge their constituents to pass their new law, pushed and financed by their friends at so and so lobbying group so that O'Reilly can't air because he would be declared Anti-American and Anti-Patriotic for raising my blood pressure. Sure it sounds far-fetched...but I bet you don't believe they are holding American born Muslim citizens that happened to have Arabic last names in Gitmo either? Heck, for that matter...they don't care if they are Arab or not, Muslim is enough to condemn under this admin...but I digress AGAIN.
So I start talking about BWalters and the View and the touching of Black women's hair. It leads me to "professional" standards of beauty which turns into Eurocentric beauty ideals. I point out the very ways we force people to assimilate, not into American culture or into America as a nation, but into White culture and into close enough White folks in order to be acceptable. Of course, that's discounted. Who would believe such a thing? I'm called a racist several times. It matters not that I call no one else a racist and use the word on rare occasions so not to diminish it's power when it is used. I'm not judging White people because I said White in a sentence. But then...there's that Illegal Immigration thread. Yes...let's talk assimilation.
So I leave the post and head to the II forum. There I find a new argument over border patrol that shot an alleged drug smuggler but have now been convicted of crimes for not following border patrol procedures and for trying to cover up their crime. The thread creator first goes on the attack..."we have to stop illegals because they are all drug smugglers." Remember..I said White in a sentence. I point out the flaws in the argument. I also point to the fact that the border patrol involved have Hispanic last names...which doesn't neccessarily lend itself to their being Hispanic, but it's a decent conclusion. So there goes the "They are all drug smugglers" argument. They broke the law in shooting this guy. I don't want a drug smuggler here anymore than anyone else. So use the law to send his ass packing. The law. The very same law the agents should have been using. End of that thread.
Next comes the Cynthia McKinney story and a video about young Black girls and their ideas of beauty. In the C.M. story, the conservative spin is that she had racists and anti-semites on staff and they said anti-semitic words, loudly I might add and in front of a camera to someone. I never figured out who and it doesn't matter. To counter the story, a man that works in talk radio and worked on staff is there to talk about the brew haha--nope, didn't spell that right either. Coz is all I recall of his name. Coz was let go because McKinney did not succeed in her bid for her seat in the House. The staff was fired in a few shifts rather than all at once. Smart move. Some one has to pack. HELLO! McKinney is no stranger to news...recall the incident of her hitting a security guard on the Hill when he denid her admission to the building because he didn't recognize her new hair style..something I will discuss later about African American women, our hair and the way it's perceived by "some". She also stood alone in voting against the war in Iraq.
So, Coz explains that McKinney is not a racist, she is not an anti-semite, though she has been vocal in saying the US needs to stop supporting Israel now in this Lebanon thing. BTW--I agree. And no, I'm not an anti-semite and have removed my own mother from a family outing for saying such remarks that my children could hear about her Jewish ex-Dh. I simply do not tolerate intolerance. Whatever that makes me, it makes me.
Hannity--Coz is on Hannity and Colmes goes after the guy and asks why McKinney hasn't apologized for the remarks. Ummm...because she didn't say them and fired the guy that did. Fired the Black man that did. So much for that racist thing too. Well, the title of the thread was Cynthia McKinney is an Anti-Semite and fires a Jewish staffer. I said this all in the wrong order. Bear with me. I'm tired and under medicated. The thread starter posted an interview that came AFTER the Coz interview ( hmm..maybe I was doing this in chronological order, yes, that's the ticket)..so in the interview with the Jewish staffer he says that he doesn't believe Cynthia McKinney is anti-semitic and has never heard her say anything that would lead him to believe that. His bone of contention is that he was fired the day after he requested a Jewish Holiday off. That's his issue. Umm...he's an idiot. She fired her WHOLE STAFF! That would include him. If it happened to fall on a holiday, why would she want to pay anyone for an additional day they were taking off? Made no sense. I posted the Coz interview to rebutte the Jewish staffer fired premise.
So...moving forward by a day. There is another drama going on but I will spare the details. In the thread that features the video with the young Black girls, a 16 year old--as this is her production-- recreates the Clarke study that was done for the Brown vs. Board of education case 30 some odd years ago. She has 21 children, all African American I believe, and she tests them with two idential dolls, except for the fact that one was Black and the other White.
My heart broke when a 5 year old was interviewed. "Which doll is the nice doll"...the little girl picks up the White doll with glee, positive she has the right answer. Next question, "Which doll is the pretty doll", again, she picks up the White doll. Now...my heart sinks...I know what is coming and I've been a 5 year old little Black girl in America. The interview continues, "Which doll looks most like you," the little girl hesitates and struggles with her choice. She politely puts the White doll back down and looks at the Black doll, her eyes veering from the floor to the doll as she puts off the inevitable. "This one,"she says and she nudges the doll forward, not even wanting to pick it up. But that doll is her...and she knows that. I'm watching a little girl's first awareness that she isn't permitted to love herself and it tore me up.
I'm jolted back into reality by the posts that follow. Now, a few people on this board are NOT just permissive of White privilege. Not only do they not scream when I bring it up, but over the past 3 years, they have learned a great deal about it and about themselves and they make real attempts to be aware of the things that go on around us. I'm fully aware that these types of people are not a majority in this country. When the question of race ( a social construct, so far better to just say ethnicity) comes up, I have to endure the "ahh, the race card again" or "Why do we always have to talk about race" or "Who cares about race, it's 2006"..or my personal faves, "My great great grandparents immigrated here..they didn't own slaves and I don't owe you anything." Well, of course no one owes me anything. I'm pretty darn self sufficient and aware of the fact that class wise, I live better than the majority. I don't apologize for that and I don't expect anything.
But what I would like is understanding. It goes a long way. Rather than throw up those same lame tired unquotables, try a new twist at keeping White privilege alive or just wake up to it and be a part of something that levels the playing field for all so you don't have to feel as if you got where you are with no effort on your part. I never try to minimize an individual's work or progress by mentioning White privilege. Not ever. But I want them aware that in the same regard that they get certain things they aren't even aware of simply for being the ethnicity they are, there are others still that are purposefully and lawfully restrained simply for being the ethnicity they are. It's not fair that I've had to work twice as hard, for twice as long to get as far...but I was raised knowing I would have to. I don't "whine" about it, because like I said..I'm better off than the next. But I just want us to all be upfront about what's real here and what's not. No, great grand parents may not have taken part in slavery...but did they assimilate, assume the prejudices of another to blend and then accept White privilege and leave their own Italian, Irish, Welsh or what have you culture behind to be White? If so, yes, then they are part of the problem and not the solution.
I don't want guilt either. People on that board felt that some times I implied they should have "White guilt". Now, that's a new one for me. WTF is that? I've certainly never seen this in action and half of my family is White by birth and the other half now by marriage. Come on! No, I'm not pushing guilt. It's not productive. It serves no one. I want no part in that. I want part of solutions. I want part of acknowledgement. I want our differences to be not tolerated but accepted. I deserve that. Not simply because of my work and my laurels but because my Native American and African ancestors toiled their lives away without compensation and saw unheard of criminal acts and crimes against humanity that someone most certainly DID participate in...and in doing so, thus created a system by which their descendants could also profit from that toil of the slave and the disconnect of humanity, divided into social constructions of race. Yep..you are damned right. Go deep, do long, do what you gotta do but get on board.
Because here's the thing...we aren't going anywhere. There aren't many left, but my Native family is still here. My African family is still here. My Irish family is still here. We aren't going to leave and we aren't taking anymore free boat rides, so people have to get over this thing of living apart without each other. We can't do that. One better, the borders will never be strong enough to keep the original inhabitants of this land away from it. Ever. The Mexicans are coming folks. It's wise to embrace them. It's wise to mark your calendars because the date will come when the population will shift..and alas, that fear I spoke about for so long on so many boards will be realized...I think that fear is this..."Once we are a minority, will the old minorities treat us the way we treated them". I think that's the real thing on Illegal immigration. I've watched that bad boy come to pass in Texas.
On many other boards I have said that brown people and black people have a common place in the soul of mankind and in God's heart. This I know to be true. Once we all figure it out, we'll be that much better and that much stronger for it. Think of voting. Think of putting our candidates where we want them and electing them into the highest offices in the country. Think of the schools being equal from neighborhood to neighborhood. Think of children that speak 2 languages naturally and then can embrace a 3rd before high school and yet another in college..as those are requirements now. We can put America back into her place as first in every field if we so desire. We can do that with our hands, fingers laced one with another, working for the same goal. We can do it all and show people how it should have been all along.
Then we can answer that fear and say with much conviction, "Hell no...we would never treat people the way we have been treated because we know what that can do to a peoples."
I poked around the political threads, saw that a guy pal of mine joined in on a few pertinent topics while I was "away" and I added my own spin on the spin. This is the purpose of aforementioned message boards; to put your spin on some previous spin. That's what we do.
Some go to fight. Some go to talk. Some go to "make friends"...and for those sorry lots, bars are cheaper and the friends longer lasting. Mind you, read that sentence again. You don't go to a board to make a friend. It's the silliest thing to do in the world. What you will find is people you agree with, people you don't and those that agree with you ( altogether different than you agreeing with them--yes, you had to be there) and even those that will not, could not, in a house, with a mouse no matter what.
So when I see the topic of "What is assimilation", an alarm goes off in my head. You see, I've known this particular group for 3 years. We've been up and down every side of every story every which way but loose...and we still end up on boards together. There is something sick about that because most of us don't particularly like each other. Second alarm. Now...with the alarms already going off, I should run. I should head for a place where I know I won't have these conversations, and where I know I won't feel compelled to state exactly how I feel, where I can pre-type the replies to each of my posts hours before it pops into the heads of "some" because it's a subject I've covered again...again and again.
I'll pull out the Anti-Racist links. I'll pull out the Tim Wise articles because I know that people, well, some people respond better to hearing the exact same thing that comes out of my mouth when it comes from a White person's mouth. This is because the filters they use to listen to me are not alerted or turned on when they hear that other speaker. With me, they see my avatar a mile away. They know what I'm going to say and I know what they are going to say...so we dance.
Now, we all know my biggest peeve is lumping and labeling. It's not ok to say ALL White people or ALL Black people or ALL Hispanic people or Asian people especially since with the latter you are talking about MANY millions of people from DIFFERENT countries that speak different languages from even each other..yet we toss them into those comfy little boxes so our brains can digest them more easily. Making someone more palettable. No, I don't know how to spell that and spell check irritates me, so it won't happen.
So..I chime in. I urge myself and plead with myself to be patient. I beg and reason with myself to not give it straight no chaser but to say it softly...but that's just not me. I am straight no chaser. Hard up, against the wall, with a pillow. No, not dirty talk..get a bartender's guide and your mind out of the gutter. But, I digress.
My two cents was this: Assimilation is not insisted upon, it's forced. It's not assimilate to "MY" culture ( not meaning me MY )because I explain that culture has not yet been created. We're only so many years old. It's just not there. Even Apple pie and baseball cannot be claimed by us. Culture is expected but impossible is where I go. I persist. I say it's forced upon all of us. People will look at their neighbors that practice voodoo and scream change, CHANGE! or you cannot stay here...you most certainly cannot be American. These same neighborly neighbors will not stop at a library to read about voodoo....they will not learn that it's Christianity in another guise. They will call out aninal sacrifice as cruel and inhumane. Well, that's why they are animals, not humans. Sorry Peta friends. We eat chicken in drive thrus. We consume more beef than ANY place on the planet. We eat our animal sacrifices too. Just because we don't watch the slaughter video does not mean we are holier than thou. It means we are dumb. It means we are hypocrites.
I move on from my perspective..and no, I didn't lay it out like that above at all. I was a bit soft and it was solely an African American slant. Then...I took notice of the "new" forum. 25 new topics in a new forum called "Illegal Immigration"...are you kidding me? And they want to talk Assimilation with ME? LMAO!
The main arguments in the I.I. forum have been the same we hear on O'Reilly...I'm not allowed to watch anymore because he does horrible things to my blood pressure. A good Liberal would sue him. A good Republican ( oxymoron ) would simply urge their constituents to pass their new law, pushed and financed by their friends at so and so lobbying group so that O'Reilly can't air because he would be declared Anti-American and Anti-Patriotic for raising my blood pressure. Sure it sounds far-fetched...but I bet you don't believe they are holding American born Muslim citizens that happened to have Arabic last names in Gitmo either? Heck, for that matter...they don't care if they are Arab or not, Muslim is enough to condemn under this admin...but I digress AGAIN.
So I start talking about BWalters and the View and the touching of Black women's hair. It leads me to "professional" standards of beauty which turns into Eurocentric beauty ideals. I point out the very ways we force people to assimilate, not into American culture or into America as a nation, but into White culture and into close enough White folks in order to be acceptable. Of course, that's discounted. Who would believe such a thing? I'm called a racist several times. It matters not that I call no one else a racist and use the word on rare occasions so not to diminish it's power when it is used. I'm not judging White people because I said White in a sentence. But then...there's that Illegal Immigration thread. Yes...let's talk assimilation.
So I leave the post and head to the II forum. There I find a new argument over border patrol that shot an alleged drug smuggler but have now been convicted of crimes for not following border patrol procedures and for trying to cover up their crime. The thread creator first goes on the attack..."we have to stop illegals because they are all drug smugglers." Remember..I said White in a sentence. I point out the flaws in the argument. I also point to the fact that the border patrol involved have Hispanic last names...which doesn't neccessarily lend itself to their being Hispanic, but it's a decent conclusion. So there goes the "They are all drug smugglers" argument. They broke the law in shooting this guy. I don't want a drug smuggler here anymore than anyone else. So use the law to send his ass packing. The law. The very same law the agents should have been using. End of that thread.
Next comes the Cynthia McKinney story and a video about young Black girls and their ideas of beauty. In the C.M. story, the conservative spin is that she had racists and anti-semites on staff and they said anti-semitic words, loudly I might add and in front of a camera to someone. I never figured out who and it doesn't matter. To counter the story, a man that works in talk radio and worked on staff is there to talk about the brew haha--nope, didn't spell that right either. Coz is all I recall of his name. Coz was let go because McKinney did not succeed in her bid for her seat in the House. The staff was fired in a few shifts rather than all at once. Smart move. Some one has to pack. HELLO! McKinney is no stranger to news...recall the incident of her hitting a security guard on the Hill when he denid her admission to the building because he didn't recognize her new hair style..something I will discuss later about African American women, our hair and the way it's perceived by "some". She also stood alone in voting against the war in Iraq.
So, Coz explains that McKinney is not a racist, she is not an anti-semite, though she has been vocal in saying the US needs to stop supporting Israel now in this Lebanon thing. BTW--I agree. And no, I'm not an anti-semite and have removed my own mother from a family outing for saying such remarks that my children could hear about her Jewish ex-Dh. I simply do not tolerate intolerance. Whatever that makes me, it makes me.
Hannity--Coz is on Hannity and Colmes goes after the guy and asks why McKinney hasn't apologized for the remarks. Ummm...because she didn't say them and fired the guy that did. Fired the Black man that did. So much for that racist thing too. Well, the title of the thread was Cynthia McKinney is an Anti-Semite and fires a Jewish staffer. I said this all in the wrong order. Bear with me. I'm tired and under medicated. The thread starter posted an interview that came AFTER the Coz interview ( hmm..maybe I was doing this in chronological order, yes, that's the ticket)..so in the interview with the Jewish staffer he says that he doesn't believe Cynthia McKinney is anti-semitic and has never heard her say anything that would lead him to believe that. His bone of contention is that he was fired the day after he requested a Jewish Holiday off. That's his issue. Umm...he's an idiot. She fired her WHOLE STAFF! That would include him. If it happened to fall on a holiday, why would she want to pay anyone for an additional day they were taking off? Made no sense. I posted the Coz interview to rebutte the Jewish staffer fired premise.
So...moving forward by a day. There is another drama going on but I will spare the details. In the thread that features the video with the young Black girls, a 16 year old--as this is her production-- recreates the Clarke study that was done for the Brown vs. Board of education case 30 some odd years ago. She has 21 children, all African American I believe, and she tests them with two idential dolls, except for the fact that one was Black and the other White.
My heart broke when a 5 year old was interviewed. "Which doll is the nice doll"...the little girl picks up the White doll with glee, positive she has the right answer. Next question, "Which doll is the pretty doll", again, she picks up the White doll. Now...my heart sinks...I know what is coming and I've been a 5 year old little Black girl in America. The interview continues, "Which doll looks most like you," the little girl hesitates and struggles with her choice. She politely puts the White doll back down and looks at the Black doll, her eyes veering from the floor to the doll as she puts off the inevitable. "This one,"she says and she nudges the doll forward, not even wanting to pick it up. But that doll is her...and she knows that. I'm watching a little girl's first awareness that she isn't permitted to love herself and it tore me up.
I'm jolted back into reality by the posts that follow. Now, a few people on this board are NOT just permissive of White privilege. Not only do they not scream when I bring it up, but over the past 3 years, they have learned a great deal about it and about themselves and they make real attempts to be aware of the things that go on around us. I'm fully aware that these types of people are not a majority in this country. When the question of race ( a social construct, so far better to just say ethnicity) comes up, I have to endure the "ahh, the race card again" or "Why do we always have to talk about race" or "Who cares about race, it's 2006"..or my personal faves, "My great great grandparents immigrated here..they didn't own slaves and I don't owe you anything." Well, of course no one owes me anything. I'm pretty darn self sufficient and aware of the fact that class wise, I live better than the majority. I don't apologize for that and I don't expect anything.
But what I would like is understanding. It goes a long way. Rather than throw up those same lame tired unquotables, try a new twist at keeping White privilege alive or just wake up to it and be a part of something that levels the playing field for all so you don't have to feel as if you got where you are with no effort on your part. I never try to minimize an individual's work or progress by mentioning White privilege. Not ever. But I want them aware that in the same regard that they get certain things they aren't even aware of simply for being the ethnicity they are, there are others still that are purposefully and lawfully restrained simply for being the ethnicity they are. It's not fair that I've had to work twice as hard, for twice as long to get as far...but I was raised knowing I would have to. I don't "whine" about it, because like I said..I'm better off than the next. But I just want us to all be upfront about what's real here and what's not. No, great grand parents may not have taken part in slavery...but did they assimilate, assume the prejudices of another to blend and then accept White privilege and leave their own Italian, Irish, Welsh or what have you culture behind to be White? If so, yes, then they are part of the problem and not the solution.
I don't want guilt either. People on that board felt that some times I implied they should have "White guilt". Now, that's a new one for me. WTF is that? I've certainly never seen this in action and half of my family is White by birth and the other half now by marriage. Come on! No, I'm not pushing guilt. It's not productive. It serves no one. I want no part in that. I want part of solutions. I want part of acknowledgement. I want our differences to be not tolerated but accepted. I deserve that. Not simply because of my work and my laurels but because my Native American and African ancestors toiled their lives away without compensation and saw unheard of criminal acts and crimes against humanity that someone most certainly DID participate in...and in doing so, thus created a system by which their descendants could also profit from that toil of the slave and the disconnect of humanity, divided into social constructions of race. Yep..you are damned right. Go deep, do long, do what you gotta do but get on board.
Because here's the thing...we aren't going anywhere. There aren't many left, but my Native family is still here. My African family is still here. My Irish family is still here. We aren't going to leave and we aren't taking anymore free boat rides, so people have to get over this thing of living apart without each other. We can't do that. One better, the borders will never be strong enough to keep the original inhabitants of this land away from it. Ever. The Mexicans are coming folks. It's wise to embrace them. It's wise to mark your calendars because the date will come when the population will shift..and alas, that fear I spoke about for so long on so many boards will be realized...I think that fear is this..."Once we are a minority, will the old minorities treat us the way we treated them". I think that's the real thing on Illegal immigration. I've watched that bad boy come to pass in Texas.
On many other boards I have said that brown people and black people have a common place in the soul of mankind and in God's heart. This I know to be true. Once we all figure it out, we'll be that much better and that much stronger for it. Think of voting. Think of putting our candidates where we want them and electing them into the highest offices in the country. Think of the schools being equal from neighborhood to neighborhood. Think of children that speak 2 languages naturally and then can embrace a 3rd before high school and yet another in college..as those are requirements now. We can put America back into her place as first in every field if we so desire. We can do that with our hands, fingers laced one with another, working for the same goal. We can do it all and show people how it should have been all along.
Then we can answer that fear and say with much conviction, "Hell no...we would never treat people the way we have been treated because we know what that can do to a peoples."
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
Stereotypes and then some
So on a message board I frequent, the topic of stereotypes came up. One of those listed was that "certain" folks aren't intelligent. Another was that "certain" folks don't read. Well, they are stereotypes. There is likely some tidbit of truth at their core, but they can be spread across humanity, every ethnicity and truth can be found when limiting the group to a smaller sub group, etc, etc blah blah do dah.
Well, I came across an article called "Black Like Them". It was about West Indians and their treatment, acceptance and role in discrimination of African Americans that are native to the country. I asked a series of questions, focused them around the aritcle and urged everyone to read the article and let's talk about it. I get 20 replies. Their answers. "Yes, they are black". Hmmm. Not what I asked. What I asked what this:Are West Indians and Jamaicans Black (African American)?
Are they treated the same as African Americans?
Does their treatment from others change after they are 1 or 2 generations removed from the West Indies or Jamaica ( read any other locale as well)?
Do these immigrants to the US believe themselves different than African Americans born here and descended from slaves? Should they?
After reading the article, did any of your perspectives change or were they supported?
I wanted to talk about what the article said about "certain other" people hiring people from the Ghetto they didn't know vs the Ghetto they did know. To that, these employers would rather hire people that live distances further away from the place of employment because they felt it improved the quality of applicants. Racists and disgusting, but this is part of the article. It said much more than that and I found one of the studies done that supported the authors perspectives. I wanted to get into the meat of the discussion. Do we allow our differences to divide us? Do we give permission to "certain other" people to have basis in their prejudice by assuming us to be different from the lot or somehow not like the rest.
Most of us have heard that from time to time. "You're not like other "certain" people" It's bs. We know it when we hear it and it tells us more about the person saying it than they care to admit. I wanted to discuss it.
Instead, I got anger. I received "I'm not reading the article, but yes, we're all the same". Damnit anyway. We give credence to stereotypes everyday. People are always watching. Someone is always paying attention to things we do blindly and unconsciously. We have to be more conscious. It's not even a thought...we have to. Two people did read the article. Their responses were dazzling and they found the original article as amazing as I did. Informative and shocking were my words. The authors last sentence was profound and prophetic. We have to be leery of giving into "certain" things because as the author puts it, "In the new racism, as in the old, somebody always has to be the nigger." Uggh. It's worth the read. Check it out.
http://www.gladwell.com/1996/1996_04_29_a_black.htm Article
Well, I came across an article called "Black Like Them". It was about West Indians and their treatment, acceptance and role in discrimination of African Americans that are native to the country. I asked a series of questions, focused them around the aritcle and urged everyone to read the article and let's talk about it. I get 20 replies. Their answers. "Yes, they are black". Hmmm. Not what I asked. What I asked what this:Are West Indians and Jamaicans Black (African American)?
Are they treated the same as African Americans?
Does their treatment from others change after they are 1 or 2 generations removed from the West Indies or Jamaica ( read any other locale as well)?
Do these immigrants to the US believe themselves different than African Americans born here and descended from slaves? Should they?
After reading the article, did any of your perspectives change or were they supported?
I wanted to talk about what the article said about "certain other" people hiring people from the Ghetto they didn't know vs the Ghetto they did know. To that, these employers would rather hire people that live distances further away from the place of employment because they felt it improved the quality of applicants. Racists and disgusting, but this is part of the article. It said much more than that and I found one of the studies done that supported the authors perspectives. I wanted to get into the meat of the discussion. Do we allow our differences to divide us? Do we give permission to "certain other" people to have basis in their prejudice by assuming us to be different from the lot or somehow not like the rest.
Most of us have heard that from time to time. "You're not like other "certain" people" It's bs. We know it when we hear it and it tells us more about the person saying it than they care to admit. I wanted to discuss it.
Instead, I got anger. I received "I'm not reading the article, but yes, we're all the same". Damnit anyway. We give credence to stereotypes everyday. People are always watching. Someone is always paying attention to things we do blindly and unconsciously. We have to be more conscious. It's not even a thought...we have to. Two people did read the article. Their responses were dazzling and they found the original article as amazing as I did. Informative and shocking were my words. The authors last sentence was profound and prophetic. We have to be leery of giving into "certain" things because as the author puts it, "In the new racism, as in the old, somebody always has to be the nigger." Uggh. It's worth the read. Check it out.
http://www.gladwell.com/1996/1996_04_29_a_black.htm Article
The View can just suck it
Well, I can't think of another jab that will really explain how I feel more than that. I wrote a letter. Perhaps I'll print it here and you'll see my concern. Hmmm...
To: ABC, Disney, Robert Iger
Dear Mr. Iger
Last week, a friend emailed me a link to a video clip of the opening segment of The View the featured comedienne, Mo’Nique. My friend’s email, simply said, “How much are we as Black women going to tolerate?” I opened the link and my jaw sat open as I watched the co-hosts, led by Barbara Walters humiliate Mo’Nique by calling her children creatures and then clasp hands with each other as Barbara said “You all come and go but we stay here.”
Now there are many ways to interpret that. Ms. Walters could have been referring to Mo’Nique merely as a guest host. She also could have been referring to Black women as co-hosts and guest co-hosts. It really doesn’t matter how she intended it, but more how it came across and that was evident by the droves of audience members that sat quietly while only a few applauded. That spoke volumes considering the demographic of the audience and if it offended them, and caught them off guard, how do you think it came across to Black women? It was appalling. But it got much worse.
On a public message board, I found thread after thread examining the show's treatment of African American women. There, I found additional clips of Brandy and Tanika Ray during their appearances on the program. During their visits, Barbara has felt it necessary to degrade them by asking them if there hair was real and worse still, put her hands all through their hair to examine it herself. I would urge you to go through the entire video library of this show and demonstrate Barbara Walters touching the hair of any White guest. I would urge you to find one of her asking if their hair was real. I thought ignorance at that level was something that disappeared with Diversity training classes that companies like ABC and Disney invest millions of dollars in. If you don’t invest that, perhaps this is as good a reason as any to start.
Over the past 2 days alone, I have had my email box flooded with links to all of these video clips and comments full of disgust directed at Barbara Walters, Bill Geddes, Joy Behar, The View and ABC. Larger organizations are currently planning boycotts of all of your products from all of your subsidiaries. It goes without saying that I’m sure your ratings reflect that Black women have turned the channel during the hour when The View is on in our neighborhoods and many are sending letters to rumored guests to appear on the show urging them to show their solidarity and disgust by not appearing on any stage with anyone that would touch their hair for their own test of authenticity.
Offenses such as these wouldn’t be tolerated in your corporate offices and shouldn’t be tolerated on any level for anyone. In fact, had any corporate employee done any of the things that Ms. Walters has done, they may well be job hunting by now to avoid potential law suits on the basis of discrimination. The kind of ignorance it takes to put your hands on another woman and run your fingers through her hair and the audacity to ask if it is real speaks only to the most disgusting members of our society. What should we expect next? Will Ms. Walters be asking Black guest hosts to shine her shoes or tap dance for her? Barbara Walters has offended and hurt many viewers with her actions and that should be apologized for and atoned for. Tolerating insensitive actions such as these have halted our society’s progress on ethnicity, religious, and gender tolerance. In 2006, it is NOT ok to continue to let those incidents slide and think no one will notice.
Until very recently, I have been a loyal viewer of ABC’s The View. The program was just the right mix of humor, current political discussion, entertainment and provided me a great break from full time stay at home motherhood while my children napped, played and readied for their day. Before their births, when I was on bed rest, the show became a regular part of my day and I welcomed the co-hosts and their personalities into my home. For 9 years, I’ve enjoyed this program but over the past few weeks, that loyalty has quickly turned into disgust.
I think ABC drastically under estimated the viewers intellect during Star Jones’ departure. For her commitment to the show, she was rewarded with disloyalty from ABC and it goes without saying from Barbara Walters and Bill Geddes. That she chose to announce her exit on her own terms was met with something I’ve never seen before even on the worst of reality shows in the character, rather lack of character displayed by Barbara Walters the next day when she and her co-hosts made light of Star’s departure and then further attempted to humiliate her by not allowing her to finish out the week. All because she didn’t make her announcement on the day ABC told her to do so. That was shameful.
I respected the fact that Star Jones didn’t get into a mud slinging contest but in watching bits and pieces of the programs since, I have seen mud come from the other co-hosts and that includes Barbara Walters and most certainly Joy Behar. This says nothing of the fact that Meredith Viera was being replaced with a woman that was more than vocal about her disdain for Star Jones and dared to criticize her for her “honesty” and timing in being forthcoming about her weight loss surgery. A woman, Rosie O’Donnell that saved her own shocking announcements for the days after her own television show ended. You should know by now that even segments of the public, myself included, that enjoyed Rosie O’Donnell’s show were shocked to here of her hiring and even more shocked that ABC must not be aware of Rosie’s blog where she, on a daily basis, chronicles her rants against the President, the media, other celebrities and anyone she can think of, yet she cast the first stone at Star Jones. That hiring spoke to the character of ABC and Disney and made clear their bottom line was essential to pit two lesbians (Rosie and Ellen) against each other in a run for an Emmy and that more care and focus was on that than on honoring loyalty of viewers and Star Jones. For that reason, even on Rosie’s blog, people have been very vocal in saying they will not be watching The View in the future.
But this is not about Star Jones at this point for me. It’s about offending and wounding an entire segment of the population.
If I am to be honest, I would say that I do not have any negative wishes for the show, but having been an Executive and having worked in the Entertainment industry for a number of years, ABC is making some serious errors in judgment that foretell of a 10th season, mid-season, cancellation due to lackluster ratings.
I do hope this email reaches someone that actually cares about daytime programming as well as decency and has some authority with Disney and ABC. I am forwarding these concerns to as many Civil Rights organizations that will hear them and an email list and message board distribution list that puts most TV show ratings to shame. At least then, no one can say they never knew about these complaints as an excuse for not acting on them.
Sincerely,
The Source
But ok, I didn't really say The Source. I'm thinking that scares people. They think I'm a leak to gossip columns. I used to do that sort of thing in my teens, but I haven't since my fake ID finally caught up to my real age and that was decades ago. So I'm putting my disdain on blast. Barbara Walters--all respect gone. Joy Behar--turns out, you were just a receptionist after all. Elizabeth Who?--and sadly, that's how they'll remember you. A weird trivia question and another sting on the Style network and still, no one will recall your name. You'll be doomed to be 'The other one' forever. Star Jones--Now, girl, you knew better. Some folks, not saying which folks, but some folks do not like to see successful African Americans, much less African American women. It reminds them of the unspoken, unthought of, the hush that is privilege of flesh tones. It reminds them that they had all the opportunities in the world and they still couldn't pull off a million dollar wedding. For shame! Meredith--You got out just in time. I'm going to gush over Matt now. Oh hell, I alreaday went through that phase. I must be getting old.
To: ABC, Disney, Robert Iger
Dear Mr. Iger
Last week, a friend emailed me a link to a video clip of the opening segment of The View the featured comedienne, Mo’Nique. My friend’s email, simply said, “How much are we as Black women going to tolerate?” I opened the link and my jaw sat open as I watched the co-hosts, led by Barbara Walters humiliate Mo’Nique by calling her children creatures and then clasp hands with each other as Barbara said “You all come and go but we stay here.”
Now there are many ways to interpret that. Ms. Walters could have been referring to Mo’Nique merely as a guest host. She also could have been referring to Black women as co-hosts and guest co-hosts. It really doesn’t matter how she intended it, but more how it came across and that was evident by the droves of audience members that sat quietly while only a few applauded. That spoke volumes considering the demographic of the audience and if it offended them, and caught them off guard, how do you think it came across to Black women? It was appalling. But it got much worse.
On a public message board, I found thread after thread examining the show's treatment of African American women. There, I found additional clips of Brandy and Tanika Ray during their appearances on the program. During their visits, Barbara has felt it necessary to degrade them by asking them if there hair was real and worse still, put her hands all through their hair to examine it herself. I would urge you to go through the entire video library of this show and demonstrate Barbara Walters touching the hair of any White guest. I would urge you to find one of her asking if their hair was real. I thought ignorance at that level was something that disappeared with Diversity training classes that companies like ABC and Disney invest millions of dollars in. If you don’t invest that, perhaps this is as good a reason as any to start.
Over the past 2 days alone, I have had my email box flooded with links to all of these video clips and comments full of disgust directed at Barbara Walters, Bill Geddes, Joy Behar, The View and ABC. Larger organizations are currently planning boycotts of all of your products from all of your subsidiaries. It goes without saying that I’m sure your ratings reflect that Black women have turned the channel during the hour when The View is on in our neighborhoods and many are sending letters to rumored guests to appear on the show urging them to show their solidarity and disgust by not appearing on any stage with anyone that would touch their hair for their own test of authenticity.
Offenses such as these wouldn’t be tolerated in your corporate offices and shouldn’t be tolerated on any level for anyone. In fact, had any corporate employee done any of the things that Ms. Walters has done, they may well be job hunting by now to avoid potential law suits on the basis of discrimination. The kind of ignorance it takes to put your hands on another woman and run your fingers through her hair and the audacity to ask if it is real speaks only to the most disgusting members of our society. What should we expect next? Will Ms. Walters be asking Black guest hosts to shine her shoes or tap dance for her? Barbara Walters has offended and hurt many viewers with her actions and that should be apologized for and atoned for. Tolerating insensitive actions such as these have halted our society’s progress on ethnicity, religious, and gender tolerance. In 2006, it is NOT ok to continue to let those incidents slide and think no one will notice.
Until very recently, I have been a loyal viewer of ABC’s The View. The program was just the right mix of humor, current political discussion, entertainment and provided me a great break from full time stay at home motherhood while my children napped, played and readied for their day. Before their births, when I was on bed rest, the show became a regular part of my day and I welcomed the co-hosts and their personalities into my home. For 9 years, I’ve enjoyed this program but over the past few weeks, that loyalty has quickly turned into disgust.
I think ABC drastically under estimated the viewers intellect during Star Jones’ departure. For her commitment to the show, she was rewarded with disloyalty from ABC and it goes without saying from Barbara Walters and Bill Geddes. That she chose to announce her exit on her own terms was met with something I’ve never seen before even on the worst of reality shows in the character, rather lack of character displayed by Barbara Walters the next day when she and her co-hosts made light of Star’s departure and then further attempted to humiliate her by not allowing her to finish out the week. All because she didn’t make her announcement on the day ABC told her to do so. That was shameful.
I respected the fact that Star Jones didn’t get into a mud slinging contest but in watching bits and pieces of the programs since, I have seen mud come from the other co-hosts and that includes Barbara Walters and most certainly Joy Behar. This says nothing of the fact that Meredith Viera was being replaced with a woman that was more than vocal about her disdain for Star Jones and dared to criticize her for her “honesty” and timing in being forthcoming about her weight loss surgery. A woman, Rosie O’Donnell that saved her own shocking announcements for the days after her own television show ended. You should know by now that even segments of the public, myself included, that enjoyed Rosie O’Donnell’s show were shocked to here of her hiring and even more shocked that ABC must not be aware of Rosie’s blog where she, on a daily basis, chronicles her rants against the President, the media, other celebrities and anyone she can think of, yet she cast the first stone at Star Jones. That hiring spoke to the character of ABC and Disney and made clear their bottom line was essential to pit two lesbians (Rosie and Ellen) against each other in a run for an Emmy and that more care and focus was on that than on honoring loyalty of viewers and Star Jones. For that reason, even on Rosie’s blog, people have been very vocal in saying they will not be watching The View in the future.
But this is not about Star Jones at this point for me. It’s about offending and wounding an entire segment of the population.
If I am to be honest, I would say that I do not have any negative wishes for the show, but having been an Executive and having worked in the Entertainment industry for a number of years, ABC is making some serious errors in judgment that foretell of a 10th season, mid-season, cancellation due to lackluster ratings.
I do hope this email reaches someone that actually cares about daytime programming as well as decency and has some authority with Disney and ABC. I am forwarding these concerns to as many Civil Rights organizations that will hear them and an email list and message board distribution list that puts most TV show ratings to shame. At least then, no one can say they never knew about these complaints as an excuse for not acting on them.
Sincerely,
The Source
But ok, I didn't really say The Source. I'm thinking that scares people. They think I'm a leak to gossip columns. I used to do that sort of thing in my teens, but I haven't since my fake ID finally caught up to my real age and that was decades ago. So I'm putting my disdain on blast. Barbara Walters--all respect gone. Joy Behar--turns out, you were just a receptionist after all. Elizabeth Who?--and sadly, that's how they'll remember you. A weird trivia question and another sting on the Style network and still, no one will recall your name. You'll be doomed to be 'The other one' forever. Star Jones--Now, girl, you knew better. Some folks, not saying which folks, but some folks do not like to see successful African Americans, much less African American women. It reminds them of the unspoken, unthought of, the hush that is privilege of flesh tones. It reminds them that they had all the opportunities in the world and they still couldn't pull off a million dollar wedding. For shame! Meredith--You got out just in time. I'm going to gush over Matt now. Oh hell, I alreaday went through that phase. I must be getting old.
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